End of a Year

In two weeks my year of service comes to an end, its mind boggling to me that an entire year has gone by. I can distinctly remember sitting in the hotel room after dropping my mom off at the airport and thinking, “this is going to be the longest year ever “ and now it’s almost over. When I came to FL I had this idea in my head about changing the world. To me being a hero and changing the world were doing things like finding a cure for cancer, or ending a war, or finding some big discovery. I think this is the thought of a lot of people today. But what I have discovered this year that to me it’s not the big people of this country like the president, the military leaders, CEOs, or even the people who run the non profits that are the heroes and the world changers and it’s not the grand gestures either. I’ve discovered that it’s the little things that can change the world. It’s a smile and a hello. It’s painting a picture and talking and sharing stories from when you were little. Its dropping what you are doing and rushing to a friend’s side when they need you. It’s holding a child when they are crying. It’s helping someone when no one else will. So even though there were and are days where I feel so completely and utterly frustrated and I can’t even begun to see the point of me being down here I do know that what I have done down here this year has made a difference.

I have loved, laughed, cried, fought, and been furious this year. I’ve grown up this year. I’ve seen life outside the safety of college, family, and familiarity and the best part is I survived and even flourished. Even though I can complain a lot about this year and the situations I’ve been put in, I am SO glad that I came down here. If I didn’t come to FL I never would have met the amazing people that I did. I wouldn’t be able to count the 16 other CVs as part of my family. I never would have attended the MOVE conference with TWLOHA and then I never would have met Brandi, Erin, and Chelsea who then encouraged me to apply for the internship. If I wasn’t living in FL I never would have had the courage to apply and now I am going to be experiencing one of my dreams. Working with an organization that I deeply respect and in a field that is near and dear to my heart.
But mixed in with the excitement of the internship and the thoughts of new friends and new adventure is the bittersweet thoughts of saying goodbye. The 16 people I have lived with this year have become so very dear to me. They have walked along side me during some very hard times. I will miss them terribly and the thought of saying goodbye breaks my heart. And I swear if one more adult tells me this is normal for someone my age and I’ll see them again and they’ll still be in my heart blah blah blah I swear I will scream. Haha I know they are well meaning but it sucks and it hurts. Anyways life is good and I never in a million years imagined that a year out of college that this is where I would be. I always thought that I would be in grad by now. I don’t regret though and I couldn’t happier about the choices that led me here.